The first role of my evening-one of the four Big Swans in Act II-had gone well, despite Fumio dragging the tempi. No real mistakes, everything neat and tidy. I wasn’t having a spectacular night tonight, but it was clean. Well, maybe it’s about superstition because I did it the first time as a joke and that night I had a spectacular performance and so now I always do it. That isn’t about superstition, or religion. She took it with her when she retired, but I still touch the strip of sticky tape that remains before going onstage. The girl who had my dressing room before me was Jewish and she put up one of those mezuzah thingies on the doorway. I’ve always thought that was a little pretentious, but whatever works for you. “Merde,” said Gwen, because that is what dancers say to each other instead of “break a leg.” Some dancers say “toi toi toi,” which is kind of an opera thing. “Although that’s used when they are flying in a V formation. “Actually, the collective noun for swans is a wedge of swans,” Dad said. And probably squeezing your father’s hand off!” “I’ll be holding my breath the whole time. I remember trying to describe my stage position so they would know where I was in the flock. My parents and my sister Gwen flew in from Michigan for my debut. Actually, it was the first ballet I ever did with the company. Everything up to that point had been going pretty well. I threw my neck out in the middle of Swan Lake tonight.
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